Friday, March 20, 2009

Home?

1) I'm sitting on my bed, on the red fushia cotton sheets that feel so crisp. With my old patchwork quilt on the bed. With the headboard that MaryAnn and I found, that she wheeled and dealed for, and that we somehow got wrapped up and loaded into the truck in the pouring rain. So many stories behind the items around me. This is my home, my room. I never knew I could feel so unsecure here in my home. Bart was right. He sure was.
I feel safer at PB's. Its been 3 weeks atleast since I spent a night here.

2) I got nervous with PB again. He is getting tired of it and I have to stop. He is so good to me. Wonderful week with him. He is such a good man it seems. My hero in a white tank top with a bouquet of gardenias.

3)Wonderful dinner with the girls. They were so funny.

4)PB is pretty upset about the job. First it was the boy going away, now this.

5)I cleaned my closet tonight. Found all kinds of things that were lost. I'm bringing order to my life. I crave it - order. Being able to enjoy my life. PB is all about order. I like that about him.

6)I been running most mornings. It feels so good to run in the woods again. PB is worried I might get jumped. I'm being so careful.

7) I have simply decided to enjoy my life with him. I treasure that sweet incredible man. I am concerned he has me on a pedestal. I am so lucky to be with him and I tell him all time. I hope he is not too good to be true.

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